Sunday, December 7, 2008

Twilight review (yes I saw it!)

Alright you all know I'm not a vampire book girl...do we call it the twilight series? Anyway, I'm sticking with vampire books. But my lover surprised me with a late night trip to Flag for dinner and a movie, and this is the movie he picked out. I've gotta say as I sat there in my Harkins chair I did feel a little excitement to learn what all you freaky deakies are gawking about all the time...but the better half of me sat there thinking "why am I sitting here getting ready to watch a movie about vampire love? RUN!". But I stayed. And here is my critically aclaimed review:
I could have COMPLETELY done without the monkey movements up a tree and ultra fast running that looked a little, well, I feel it apropriate to use the word again, COMPLETELY FAKE! I mean when I was a kid Interview with a vampire was my favorite movie...they didn't have freaky wierd movements like that in it. I mean half of the audience laughed everytime Edward ran or went up a tree...kinda took away from the movie for me.
My advice for the next movie...no more running and climbing trees like a monkey, but more stopping wrecking cars with your bare hands...HOT! Ok, and I heard a lot of complaints about the casting...since I didn't read the book, I've gotta give my "what I think about the casting" review. At first I thought Edward was soo ugly yet vampiresche. By the end, I thought he was hot and wished Jase was a real vampire. Bella, I loved her. And I read on someone's blog that they could never be friends with her. I'd love ot be friends with her. Of coarse, I went through a bit of a dark/goth stage in life. I'm one of the weirdies.
Now I will tell you what I liked about the movie....cover your children's eyes....the sexual tension! My gosh people! Seirously, for the first hour of the movie it was just Bella and Edwards with their amazingly longing eyes starring at each other at different venues. Then, THEN when they finally start speaking and stop hating, it's like they have to have their lips an inch away from each other's everytime they talk, which, you know, usually leads to something. AND THEN, THEN, when they finally kiss and he shoves himself against the walll......AHH! I wanted to scream....get it on! So that part did leave me longing for more. And I was reasurred by someone that they do finally get it on in part 4 or something? Can someone tell me when so I can know which other one to watch. Not that Like porn, but I do want to make sure they break that intense tention. Did anyone else feel a lot of majorly hot sexual tension during this movie? AHH! oH, and I agree with Amy....although I don't know how much she was involved int he book, there should have been more Alice in the movie...she's adorable...but the creepy guy that she was with...he shouldn't have existed...weird.
Ok, and there you have it, a movie review from a non vampire book lover.
For the love of, well, her blood...KISS HER EDWARD, you FREAK!

14 comments:

LuAnne said...

Now you have to read the book! Some parts of the movie probably don't make sense if you didn't read the book. I had to keep explaining things to Steve when he went with me to watch it.

You were in Flag at the movies last night??? SO WERE WE! We should have gone together! We took the kids to see Madagascar.

LuAnne said...

PS - I'm proud of you for watching it :)

Alona said...

Hey, I'm in the same boat. Susannah and I read the first book, but didn't fall in love with it like most people we know. The movie was a little cheesy and I too could have done with out some the special effects, but I liked the casting. I liked that they used Cedric Diggory from Harry Potter as Edward.

Jessica said...

YAY! I am so jealous of you for watching the movie before me! We went to Flag saturday and I wanted to go watch it sooo bad, but I told Beau he didn't have to take me this time...which I totally regret now!

You should for sure read the books...you'll be glad you did! Always 10x better then their movie!

kAyLa GuTtErY said...

YEAH!! AGREE AGREE AGREE!!!! i loved it! i thought alot of it was way cheesy but then again i havent read the book, like that grass seen. . . oh my gosh, CHEESE! But i guess in the book thats on of the best parts er something! i can't wait to see the rest, i guess we shoul get reading? . . . Na :)

Abbey said...

Gotta stick up for myself here! I couldn't be friends with her because she gives nothing back! She's such a Debbie Downer. I couldn't be friends with someone who never smiled! I need laughter and joy, haha. You should read the books so you can read the 4th one, it totally makes up for all the tension!

Abbey said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Em said...

This has to be one of your best posts yet! I haven't seen the movie, but your rant about the sexual tension is absolutely brilliant! I love it.

When I see it I will most likely laugh through it thinking of this post.

alison said...

Seriously Kristal, give into the peer pressure nad just read teh books, the movie was alright but doesn't even come close to the books. The reason you didn't like Alice's husband Jasper was because he is new to the "Vegetarian" life style so he has a really hard time being around Bella(hence the freaky odd faces) Glad you liked it, the books have some major sexual tension, way more then the movie could show!

Tamee said...

I don't know about the teeny girl movie but I LOVE Jo and Sams family pictures and I WANT one like that for me. ARGH!@!!!!!
I hate family pictures.
What a whole day in Flagstaff with the girls? Who live the great life? You! Way to much fun.

Raysha said...

Just read the da*# books all ready!!! If you want sexual tension.............just read them. Or, read the partial draft Midnight Sun which is Twilight written in Edwards point of view. You can only read it online. I read that right before I saw the movie which is probably why I was so critical of the movie.

Amy John said...

Kristal, the cheesiness of it all was so retarded. There is NO cheese in the book. That pissed me off when I saw how cheesy and dumb some of things he did in the movie were! He is already awesome, why did they think that they had to UP his awesomeness for the movie by making him be a monkey in a tree you know? Conclusion- Books, GREAT. Movie, TOTALLY CHEESY BUT GOOD BECAUSE WE KNOW HOW AWESOME THE REAL STORY IN THE BOOKS ARE.

Yes the guy that played Jasper was weird... and I can't stand Kristin Stewart (the girl who played Bella). Therefore it made me hate Bella even more than I already did. Bella is SO not deserving of my Edward! She is clumsy, ordinary, clumsy, and just yuck. Edward deserves someone, well, like ME!!! I love him more than Bella does I can gaurentee you that.

I am SO glad you watched it, but I wish you had read the book first, because the movie was just silly at times. And it really shouldn't be that way. PLEASE read 2 and 3 so that you can read 4. It is BY FAR the best one. And you will be glad that you did. TRUST ME.

Allred's said...

I admired the sexual tension so much as well. But you know your right, I am having a hard time putting the books on my to-do list.

Williams Family said...

Hey Krystal I'm with Raysha on this if you read the books it starts out with her thoughts and how she goes more into her feelings. Almost like your apart of Bella's life. I have to say that I'm not much of a reader but when a good book comes along I can't put it down and everything around me goes to pot. My husband hated it when I read them because nothing ever got done. Just had to throw in my view of the book. Sorry.