Wednesday, March 20, 2013

STAY AT HOME mom

So I've been feeling like my life all of a sudden got 10x busier over the last year and a half (since we moved here).  I can never keep up with kid's schedules, the 2 babies at home, keeping the house clean, cooking and getting a little (LITTLE) shut eye.  The days seemed so much shorter, and needs became more demanding!  I realized all the moms of 4 or more kids around the ages of mine were feeling THE SAME WAY.....until I met a friend who seemed content, relaxed,  found time to chill with her kids, cooked most every single meal, her daughters hair was done everyday, as well as her own (this is a struggle for us) and her house is mostly together all of the time (she watches a ton of kids during the day, so there are 2 rooms that are covered in kids and toys most of the day, but the rest of the house seemed pretty well put together).  I realized everyone LOVES her, but she doesn't do a lot of social things.  I realized I was feeling the need to say yes to every single outing I was invited to.  Maybe because in JC I was the one that planned them, and did them and I never got invited, mostly because no one ever did girls nights, or movie nights, or family BBQ's there (well, except with their extended family).  But she did do church activities, and she did make sure her kids knew she was there FOR THEM, not for HER. I feel like up until last month, I said, "I'm going out with _____ to go and _____, you guys are staying here with dad".  a lot!  It's been hard to say no, or to find legit, honest reasons to get out of get togethers with friends, or even family sometimes, so that I can stay at home with the kids more...but I"VE LOVED IT!  And there's still a lot of selfishness in my day...ie, painting my headboard, painting my hutch, sewing, trying out new Pinterest recipes, etc....but I feel so much more productive.  I like that my kids see me get things done, rather than fret and panic and stress that there isn't enough time to do anything, and then go hang out with friends.  ugh!  I LOVE friends, and I LOVE GNO's...but I think one a month is fine, and what mom's don't like a GNO in the form of taking the kids to the park together to wear them out for nap time?!  Anyway, since I can't completely get back to my simple country life right now, I've got to simplify what I have to work with here.  Including teaching my kids to say no!  There's just so much stinking stuff going on here all the time for the kids...and they usually get a bit mad at me when I tell them they need time at home, but there are some days when i feel like they are only here for an hour in the morning and an hour before bed, and they're too young to be away from home that much (in my opinion)....and the amazing thing...if/when they complain that I didn't let them go, they're perfectly fine with staying home within a few minutes.  Kamryn isn't in an activity right now, and it's so nice! I love having extra time with her.  The boys are both in soccer, but we ditch most every week.  It's been nice just hanging out, going to parks, playing in the front or backyard, teaching them to cook, playing card games, and yes, watching tv or hilarious youtube videos together. I like these guys, and I wanna hang out at home with them as much as I can before they hit the inevitable, busy teenage years!  So thanks friend (you know who you are) for reminding me it's ok to say no, it's ok to stay home, it's ok to not be social, and it's especially ok to  be happy with it all...especially at this stage of life when our little ones need us more, and need to learn all of the domestic (even these boys) things of life!











3 comments:

Erin said...

Great post!! And cutest picture ever!!

Cathy said...

Good job Kristal. I definitely look forward to park dates where my kids get worn out and I get to chat with my adult friends. I am hoping after spring break is over, I can get back to quiet semi non social life of hanging with my kids.

Jamie Y. said...

I'm lovin these last few posts of yours. I love how you keep it real and yet are so inspiring. I remember when I used to look for any excuse to get out of the house in the evenings...pampered chef parties, Mary Kay parties, Shade parties, blah, blah, blah. Now I look for every excuse to stay home in the evenings. I like to think I'm finally maturing and realizing my priorities in life. It's a good feeling.